Greatest Gift

brothers eggs

brothers eggs 2It’s time.
Here you go. 

They’re yours.

To cherish. To nurture. To love. 
And love them you most certainly will,
just as I have loved you.

This is the most beautiful gift I can give you. 
But it will cause you unspeakable pain as well. 
And break your heart.
And keep you up at night with worry.
And bring you to your knees. 
Time and time again.

Even still, you’ll never love anything so fiercely.
Your heart will never be filled so completely. 

Nothing will ever feel this right. 
Now go. Go and love–as I have taught you. 

Then we stretch forward our hands, wrap our arms  tightly around this tiny body and make promises we have every intention of keeping.  We know what we’re getting into, we think.  We know there will be ups. There will be downs.  There will be mistakes and trials and stumbles and pit falls and broken hearts.  But even amidst the inevitable pain, this is what we signed up for.  Because somewhere inside of us we know that we were born for this.

I am not afraid. I was born to do this. -Joan of Arc
That’s what I had stamped onto a favorite bracelet of mine.  I wear it as my daily reminder. A reminder that I, ME, ASHLEY was born to be the mother of these two awesome boys.  I was chosen specifically for them.  It was not random or coincidence.  It was very very very much on purpose–because I am the best person for the job as their mom.

And that creeping doubt that tries to tell me I’m making all the wrong choices for my children…that creeping doubt is not coming from the same place that chose me to be the mother of these babies.  That creeping doubt wants me to fail. And I won’t let that happen.

farm brothers

sawyer horse

underwood farms pony underwood farms hay stackunderwood farms wagon underwood farms wood trainunderwood farms sheepwesley farmunderwood farms baby goat wesley trainsawyer underwood farms

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  • Reply
    April 27, 2014 at 8:59 am

    Oh this is good. So. Good. And those boys are the cutest!!!

  • Reply
    April 27, 2014 at 10:13 am

    Love love love this. So true.

  • Reply
    April 27, 2014 at 11:42 am

    Oh, wow. That quote is so powerful. I love it and definitely sets your mind in place.

  • Reply
    April 27, 2014 at 3:17 pm

    Thank you. It seems like you almost always manage to post something like this right when I need to read it. God bless you Ashley! X

  • Reply
    April 27, 2014 at 10:39 pm

    Beautiful and encouraging post.
    thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    April 28, 2014 at 5:49 am

    There should be a law against having such beautiful little boys. You are doing everything right. I love when you show pictures of those special little angels. God Bless

  • Reply
    Danielle S
    April 28, 2014 at 9:15 am

    I am totally relating to this message right now! My 2.5 year old and I have recently been doing battle with potty training and introducing the toddler bed AT THE SAME TIME! I feel tested and stressed, but she completes me in a way that is so profound and beyond words that I can not imagine my life without her.

  • Reply
    April 28, 2014 at 11:39 pm

    OMG that picture of Sawyer giving someone/something the stink eye literally made me laugh out loud!

  • Reply
    April 29, 2014 at 12:13 am

    I am retiring from corporate life on Wednesday to be home with my amazing, wonderful 2-year-old, and this post was beyond perfect for me to read today. I’m excited and nervous…and thrilled that we’re blessed with the means for me to do this. I pray that I will do a good job! Thank you for this boost.

  • Reply
    April 29, 2014 at 3:20 pm

    Thank you so much for this post. I needed to hear this today. Thank you for following the inspiration you are given.

  • Reply
    Danielle @ The Girlfriend Letters
    May 1, 2014 at 12:26 am

    Love this! Sometimes I worry that I’m missing some huge thing in raising my little guy, or have a momentary freak out that I have no idea what I’m doing (because I don’t). But he’s still alive… and I remember I don’t have to do it all alone!

  • Reply
    June 3, 2014 at 12:26 pm

    I needed this tonight, it brought me to tears, thank you for posting!

  • Reply
    July 3, 2014 at 3:37 am

    Oh, this is just so good. And true. And shines with love. I follow you on Instagram and pop over here once in a while, but today I’ve stayed a little longer and have been combing through your posts, which are just so gorgeous. Everything you do shines with beauty and intention. You are a beautiful mama inside and out. I never, ever do this, but I recently wrote a post for my two boys and learning more about your relationship with yours today, I thought you could relate.


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