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Leaving on a Jet Plane

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Ring c/o Horse Feather Gifts
I’m swooning over this bracelet too. Oh and these–I need them.

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I woke up this morning only semi-prepared for my endless list of to-do’s .
I started the day with a warm cup of hot chocolate because it only seemed appropriate for the uncharacteristically foggy day we were having. I kissed Ben on his way out the door and rather than tackle the dishes piling in the sink from dinner the night before, I immediately loaded the boys into the car to get donuts in our pajamas.

After donuts, we built our largest train track obstacle yet. Then we watched Toy Story under warm blankets pulled from the dryer (Wes: make the blankies hot mommy). And when I finally did tackle those dishes, it took twice as long as it should have because I kept pausing to take dozens of mental snapshots (and one real shot) of Wesley playing in the backyard. The to-do list could wait a little longer…

I suppose I wasn’t ready to acknowledge that I was leaving for a few days.
Probably because I have never been away from Sawyer for more than a few hours.
And probably because experience has proven to me that I have a tough time being away from Wesley.
Even when I oh-so-desperately NEED and even WANT a break from my everyday life…even then, it’s really hard to be away.

Without fail, every time,
on the day before I leave,
I become overwhelmed with irrational fear.
That darn “what-if” fear.
If you know the fear I’m referring to, then you know it can be paralyzing.

Almost as if the universe could sense my melancholy, Wesley dished up an extra dose of sweetness today…with several impromptu “I love yous” and bunches of eskimo kisses. And Sawyer squirmed less and lingered longer in the crook of my neck.

For the briefest of seconds I considered canceling my plans—if I stayed home then I would be in control of the “what ifs”.  But because I’m determined to live a life of fleeting fear and faith in abundance, I packed my suitcase and reminded myself how excited I am for this weekend of inevitable fun and lasting memories. I need this.

If you’re curious, this is where I’m headed—and I’m giddy with excitement.
Ben doesn’t get it, but I think that’s because he doesn’t know how to use a glue gun and ruffle aprons aren’t really his thing.

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19 Comments

  • Reply
    Michelle
    April 5, 2013 at 7:12 am

    Have a blast at CW! Some day I would like to attend! Can’t wait to see the pictures you take! xoxo!

  • Reply
    Summer @ Made By Munchie's Mama
    April 5, 2013 at 7:14 am

    Ohhhh, Gav would be in heaven with that train set…and then he would throw it when Wes tried to play with it too. We are still working on sharing. P.S. it’s not going well

  • Reply
    Nazzia
    April 5, 2013 at 10:15 am

    WOW! This seems like such a fun place to be. You’re gonna have so much fun.
    Go on…have a blast! Your boys will be fine.

  • Reply
    Katherine
    April 5, 2013 at 10:55 am

    Wow. That is a lot of craft fun :0)

    I totally understand what you mean by the “what-if paralyzing fear”. All. the. time.

    Breathe deep, seek peace, and have a blast weekend!

  • Reply
    Heidi L.
    April 5, 2013 at 12:45 pm

    yahoo for you! hope you have a simply wonderful time!!

  • Reply
    Tia P
    April 5, 2013 at 1:38 pm

    It is reassuring to know that other mom’s experience the same thoughts/fears/joys that I do, but I do completely feel for you. I am a mess before I travel. I try to remind myself that absence does indeed make a heart grow fonder, and I look forward to my return home and the welcome that comes with it! Have a wonderful trip, and enjoy your welcome home!

  • Reply
    Amy K.
    April 5, 2013 at 1:58 pm

    I would come all the way to CA & drive you there myself if you decided to skip out on CW!!!!! I promise, promise, promise you will be beyond thrilled that you went! And the feeling of landing back at home, knowing those babies are waiting for you? Nothing like it!

  • Reply
    katie
    April 5, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Ahhhh, I’m so jealous! I ooh and ahh over every Creative Weekend post!! I want to be Meg!! Have so much fun!!

  • Reply
    Michelle
    April 5, 2013 at 4:55 pm

    Looks like such a fun weekend planned ! Have fun ! Cannot wait to see what you make !

  • Reply
    Jackie
    April 5, 2013 at 5:08 pm

    Take a deep breath, relax, and ENJOY your weekend! Every Mama needs some time to herself to do something she loves, to just be a woman. My something is a scrapbooking day every August. (I wish it was a weekend!).

  • Reply
    Sarah
    April 5, 2013 at 5:47 pm

    Have a great weekend! I ALWAYS fall victim to the “what ifs!”

  • Reply
    Kristal
    April 5, 2013 at 6:54 pm

    I know you have probably told your readers this before, but where is your couch from? I love it! Is it crazy to have white and keep it clean with the kiddos? If you could let me know, I would so appreciate it! Long time reader, love your blog! Enjoy your time this weekend, you deserve it and taking time away makes you a better mama. A couple days away will refresh you, give you some girl time, and then just imagine the excitement you’ll feel coming back to your boys. 🙂
    Kristal

    • Reply
      Tina
      April 9, 2013 at 3:45 pm

      I want to know too! 🙂

  • Reply
    Denise
    April 6, 2013 at 3:02 am

    i always want to go to craft weekend, but like you, don’t want to be away from my little one, so i haven’t put my name in the raffle. i am putting it in this year! and if it’s mean to be, i will go. have fun! enjoy your time away! how can you not, right? ruffled aprons, antiquing, sonic happy hour!

  • Reply
    McKenzie Guymon
    April 6, 2013 at 3:25 am

    I freak out when I leave my family too! Have so much fun though! It looks like it will be a blast! I am going to Snap in 2 weeks and I have already started having those nasty what if thoughts. I know once I get there though, I will have so much fun!

  • Reply
    The Dose of Reality
    April 6, 2013 at 4:35 pm

    I feel you. I am the cautionary tale.
    My kids are 13 and 9. That’s YEARS old. Until this past January, I had not been away without them since my son was 3. I had never…NEVER been away since my daughter was born. That’s right. Never.

    Some of that was just circumstance and lack of opportunity, but I had a whole list of “what ifs” in my head, too, as I was getting ready to go.

    It was the BEST. LONG. WEEKEND. TRIP. EVER!!! I already have another planned with my girlfriends.
    Hope you have fun weekend!! –Lisa

  • Reply
    amanda
    April 10, 2013 at 2:16 am

    Sounds like a blast was waiting for you!Hope you enjoyed it. xo

  • Reply
    Tracy
    April 11, 2013 at 5:05 pm

    My husband doesn’t get the craft weekends either. Remember though, when you are a better woman you are a better wife and mother. It is important to get time to yourself, to create, and inspire other women. You come home and appreciate what you have even more and you didn’t even think that was possible. Im so glad you had a good time. I followed all pics and was jealous every minute!! Xx

  • Reply
    Jessica
    April 28, 2014 at 4:27 am

    Where are your sectional and rug from? I am in the market for a new sectional that is “kid friendly”.

    I absolutely adore your blog, thank you for being so honest. I am fairly new follower and I am also a mommy in training to my 9 month old son.

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