On My Mind: 5 things
button down // sweatshirt tunic // sweater // shoes (similar) // jeans // glasses
Super comfy and classic outfit c/o one of my favorites: J.Jill
dress // jacket // shoes // bag // glasses
I turned 31 this month. And rather than go on my usual “oh, where has the time gone” rant, I feel more like telling you whats been on my mind for 31. 5 quick things that I’ve been thinking about lately:
Embrace the good in each season.
It could be your toddler’s terrible twos. It could be that you’re still 3 sizes away from fitting into your favorite jeans. It could be an awkward hair cut. It could be that your house is an unorganized nightmare. Whatever it is, it’s only a season—at it shall pass. So often, when the kids are melting down or being especially “wild” and I’m feeling completely helpless, I’ll look over to Ben and give him one of those looks that says “what have we gotten ourselves into”. Without fail, every time I shoot him one of these looks, he smiles back and reminds me, “this is what you always wanted babe”. And he’s right. These boys of mine, this little family we’ve made, this home we’ve nurtured—they are the answer to years of prayers. THEY are the season of life I’ve looked forward to the most over the years. So I sure as hec better not focus on the dirty dishes and temper tantrums and lost library books. There will always be yuckiness—we just have to work extra hard to not let it overshadow all that is beautiful in the phases of our life.
Get you hair wet.
Back before Wes and Sawyer were even a blip in my mind, I knew I would be the momma who got her hair wet when swimming. And jump on the trampoline. And have nerf wars. And build forts. And jump on the bed. And go barefoot. And eat cookie dough. Because having kids is the perfect excuse to never grow up.
Take off your make up.
Be vulnerable with relationships you want to cultivate. Start by not wearing makeup in front of your friends. My naked skin is not pretty. Not pretty at all, in fact. I have lines and spots and scars and marks that tell the stories of my more careless youth. I’m no stranger to feelings of shame when someone happens upon me with no foundation. But that’s why we need friends–friends who let us air out our shame in their front yard with no judgment and prove to us that we can be loved despite our flaws. Show them you trust them with your nakedness.
Don’t let compliments go unspoken.
You know that nice thing you’re thinking about the person standing in front of you telling you a story, or the lady ringing you up at the store, or the teacher at your sons school, or your sister in law…. Maybe it’s the fabulous hair day she’s having, or her stunning shoes, or the inspiring message she just shared with the group, or her example of motherhood, or the delicious cookies she baked for you, or the way she lights up a room. Whatever it is, if you’re thinking it—say it. It feels so dang good to give someone a sincere compliment, to watch their face light up when your kind words prove to them that they are being seen. Because that’s what we want– to be seen, to be validated, to know that what we’re doing matters even a little bit. Never pass up an opportunity to tell someone they matter.
And lastly, a writer I admire’s words (not mine): imperfections put people at ease…and I like to put people at ease.
What’s been on your mind?
I want to be better at each of these points. Perfect for me. Thank you!
every word of this post hit me today! especially the complimenting part. going to try and do this more. thank you!
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I too turned 28 this month but I guess I am still at the “oh my god, where has the time gone” phase.
Anyways happy birthday Ashley. Your little boys are precious! And you are an amazing momma! I am sure you’re a hero to them.
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Loved this post! Definitely bookmarking it for the future. 🙂 Everything you mentioned resonated with me — finding the good in every type of situation is something I’ve been working on lately. As well as being more vulnerable with others. How can we build a deeper relationship if there’s always some type of wall between us or we’re holding back on the good things we actually want to say? Thanks, Ashley!
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I love this post! Every point was so spot on. Thanks for that encouragement today. =)
Oh, I love all of these! Fantastic, beautiful, honest. Love. And happy, happy birthday to you.
I love all of these points but especially the one about getting your hair wet. I, like you, jump right in along with my kids in whatever activity they’re doing- whether it’s finger painting or sledding down a hill. It IS the perfect excuse to stay forever young. Thanks for sharing!
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Nice little write up. Thanks for sharing.
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I love all of these points. They are so spot on. I am so bad about letting compliments go unspoken. So, I will be sure to let you know that I adore that first outfit in this post. 🙂
How true, I have learned at 46 if you don’t like the way I look, turn your head. My husband, child, family & friends, love me. The compliment part is so true. Being kind, takes no extra time, and brings smiles to people who are having a moment that I am blessed to share in.
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Thank you so much for this post Ashley. I needed to read this so much right now. Especially the first point of this post is just perfect to me and puts things in perspective. U are so right. Thank you for sharing and making me realise this.
I’ve been following ur blog for aprox 1,5 year now. And u are very inspiring. Actually Im not really into this Whole blogging thing. Except yours 🙂 My life is pretty busy and somehow similair to yours. I’ve 3 girls. One just turned 4, one just turned 2,5 and a 4 month old babygirl. The biggest difference between us probably is, that it seems like, u have a constant summer ( which I envy alittle bit 😉 ) I live across the World in Denmark – and I’m freezing my butt of 😉
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Love this post, especially about giving compliments and that last quote! 🙂
What wonderful advice!! I love all of these. I’m a young single adult preparing for motherhood and marriage and your posts make me SO EXCITED for motherhood. I have much to prepare for but much to look forward too. Thanks for being such a beautiful inspiration and excellent role model for me. 🙂
Love your beautiful optimism. Its great to read about it and helps make me think about my day a little brighter. Thanks for sharing whats on your mind lately 🙂
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