Sometimes the hubby and I lay in bed at night
and we play the what if game…
Or as I like to call it,
the what would we do in another life game.
What if we had made different choices?
Taken a different path?
Gone into different industries?
Waited longer to have kids?
Lived in a different part of the country?
Or in another country entirely?
What if…
And it’s not that we don’t love the life we’re leading,
because we do–very mucho mucho, in fact.
It’s just fun to sometimes say,
in another life I totally would have done ___________.
And here are MY other lives:
NY City Girl
You know, like the life Andy Sach’s lives in The Devil Wears Prada. Where I live in a small studio apartment, with brick walls and a murphy bed. I walk to work in 5 inch heels with my Starbucks hot chocolate and seemingly effortless style. I dine with important and philosophical people every evening, and we discuss current affairs and the state of the union–because in this life, I read the newspaper. I collect art, wear vintage shoes, and carry a worn out copy of Pride and Prejudice in my satchel. I am a columnist for a national woman’s magazine {perhaps Lucky or Glamour}, with dreams of writing the next great American novel. On weekends I relax in cafe window seats with my feet propped up on my hubby’s lap, as we watch the passersby and try to guess the types of lives they lead.
Small Town Girl
I live in a quaint town on the coast of North Carolina–the ones you read about in Nicholas Sparks novels or see on the Gilmore Girls. My house has a wraparound front porch, fireflies and a tire swing. It’s safe enough for my kids to walk to school, swim in the creek, and sleep on the porch in the summertime. My hubby owns an insurance agency {like he does now} and I own a local book store on Main Street. There are festivals, parades, bingo nights, and bake sales {picture Sweet Home Alabama}. We eat at the same diner every Saturday morning and take the same afternoon stroll down the beach every Sunday. I collect sea shells, read good books and have kiddos who enjoy playing outside with sticks and rocks. We where plaid, like country music and drink lemonade. Life is simple, and we like it that way.
The Traveling Nomad
With nothing but our REI backpacks, fancy camera and leather journals the hubby and I embark across the globe without a plan. A month in a small Italian village, hopping the Greek Islands, sitting in the same cafe as Hemingway, walking the Great Wall, running my fingers through the sand on the beaches of Normandy, climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro, surfing in Maui, hiking through ruins in Mexico, breaking bread with the locals until 3 in the morning–and I suppose having a few Eat, Pray, Love moments along the way. Not a care in the world, living life from day to day.
So that’s it.
These are my other lives.
Pretty glamorous, if you ask me.
But you know what?
Even on my worst day,
I wouldn’t trade the life I have.
Because, while I am a dreamer and an optimist,
I am also a realist.
And I know that I can’t have it all.
I can’t be a world traveler, career woman,
small town girl and mother of the year.
When I was 19,
I thought I could have it all.
And then, when I was 20, I spotted a dimple faced,
bright eyed Midwestern boy from across the room at UCSB,
and I made my choice.
Him,
And wherever that journey would take us.
34 Comments
Bec @ eleventhirtyish
March 12, 2011 at 7:56 ambeautifully written! Like you, whatever the other lives i dream of, i still come right back to this imperfectly perfect life i have right now! But if i may play along for a moment i would have a very similar version of your three gals and i totally want to live in "Stars Hollow" and would be bff's with Lorelei and would definetly be getting my Latte's from Lukes! Hmm i like this game!! Think i may have to do a post if i may borrow your idea? – will link back to you! xx
Aubrey
March 12, 2011 at 1:35 pmI just loved this.
amomwithalessonplan.com
March 12, 2011 at 1:45 pmhmmmmm. . .in my other life? In my other life I am totally fashionable and wear adorable things like belts over my sweater and red skinny pants. It really doesn't matter what I wear because I look cute even when I'm sitting on the toilet in sweats taking pictures of myself in the mirror. I know exactly what necklace to put with which shirt, my make up is always perfect and a brown beret is just the icing on the cake.
But I guess I'll have to keep living fashion vicariously through you!
Girl of The Grove
March 12, 2011 at 2:15 pmLoved reading this Ashley.
I'd hop into your small town souther girl scenario any day!!
Jessica
March 12, 2011 at 2:34 pmWOW! You totally should be a writer! You sucked me in and kept me at Nicholas Sparks! 🙂 Beautifully written! And our thought paths are so alike…I think we would totally be friends if we lived close!
Ashley @ Life Is Beautiful
March 12, 2011 at 2:39 pmI thought this was such a beautiful post! The "other lives" were nice to read about, but I definitely loved the last of your post! {Even though I do love the small town girl one, which I am, but not that awesome.} 😀
-Many Smiles!
Lisa Christine Johnson
March 12, 2011 at 3:31 pmWhat you said towards the end about having it all at 19, and then making your choice at 20 totally reminds me of a quote I recently saw online somewhere. "You can do ANYTHING but you can't do EVERYTHING." This seems to fit this post well, and it's a good thing for everyone to keep in mind. The world is out there for us all to do whatever we want, be whoever we want, but we have to make choice and STICK with those choices! Glad I made a good one! And it seems that you did too!
A Thrifted Market
March 12, 2011 at 3:33 pmCute post! I actually live the small town life with the small community and I love it! The only thing I would change is maybe the heat around here..somewhere cooler on the front porch would be nice. I also fell for a cute boy at age 20 and we celebrated 21 years of marriage 2 days ago! Not always easy but always worth it!
Jenae @ Wildflower
March 12, 2011 at 4:09 pmLove this post!!
dubb and dawni
March 12, 2011 at 4:21 pmThe Hubby and I say when we win the lottery we will… The Funny thing is we have NEVER played the lottery! Kinda fun to dream big. I think it keeps your marriage fun to dream of big things together. I just have to admit in my other live I would be a "country western singer" but shhhhh don't tell !!!
Lindsi
March 12, 2011 at 4:31 pmSeriously a girl after my own heart! The three other lives your described, are pretty much my ideas in a nutshell! Except the one where I LIVE in Italy!
I love this post!
Jamie Rubeis
March 12, 2011 at 4:44 pmI wanted to tear up! So sweet. My hubby and I play the What If game a lot too… but I wouldn't change ANYTHING about the choice I made.
Jessie K
March 12, 2011 at 4:56 pmIn my other life I would have gone to college, gotten a degree in a foreign language (spanish specifically), lived and worked in another country, learning their culture. I would have traveled the world, seen the sights, got the t-shirt. In fact I'd still like to make that a reality with my hubby and kids along.
Another life I would have been a cowgirl on a ranch, breaking horses all day long. I would have become a renowned horse trainer, training the next Smart Little Lena, Doc Bar, or Doc O'Lena. I still intend to make owning a few horses a reality. We just need to settle down, first.
Jessie K
March 12, 2011 at 4:58 pmHey, you should do a linky party with this post!
little miss vintage
March 12, 2011 at 5:47 pmlove your other "lives" I totally could envision all of those for myself as well. But, like you I met a handsome ( bump into a wall because you couldn't take your eyes off of him) boy at 16, not 19. It's been 9 years since I laid eyes on him in the halls of our high school and the rest is history! P.S. I always enjoy reading your posts, you're so real and inviting.
Amber
Heidi @ Honeybear Lane
March 12, 2011 at 5:51 pmI play that game a lot too! Only right now I find myself doing it more with the idea that I am married without kids and free to come and go as I please and NEVER have to see gross poop. But I have to admit, that North Carolina picture you painted sounds lovely…I have that same dream. But I'm older, my kids are older. This time of life is just difficult with little kids that need our constant care. But it's so fleeting and I wouldn't miss it for anything.
sarah
March 12, 2011 at 7:23 pmOh I'll take small town any day. There's a perfect little mountain country town about 3omin away from me, Oak Glen. It's apple country, It snows, they get a real fall season, it's beautiful and it's only 30min from the city and the nearest Joann's fabrics store : )
kvstl
March 12, 2011 at 9:05 pmFirst time commenting on your blog but I visit every day! Your words are always so thoughtfully expressed and touch so many people in positive ways. THANK YOU for being such an inspiration to me as a new mommy with a 7 month old girl. Your are a fantastic mom and I can totally relate to thinking of "what if?" but I also always come back to where I am now in my life and wouldn't change it for the world.
jamie @ kreyv
March 12, 2011 at 10:07 pmLove that post! You know, I've never really thought about it. One thing I would change? My husband would be dunzo with residency!
Lindsay
March 12, 2011 at 11:57 pmThis is adorable Ashley. Well said. I think about these things ALL THE TIME too 🙂
Heather
March 13, 2011 at 12:47 amI would pack up and move to Paris like Jordan @ Oh Happy Day http://www.wakingupinvegas.com/2011/02/16/fave-new-read-oh-happy-day/
Wish I could get up the courage and "just do it"…but the dream seems so far from reality. You know?
Jayna Rae
March 13, 2011 at 6:09 amGreat post! I will have to muse on my other life. I have followed a pretty clear trajectory so I have never truly thought about it before.
tricia!
March 13, 2011 at 3:14 pmi dont even know you… i know the stock family so i stumbled upon your page! this was beautifully written 🙂
Kari
March 14, 2011 at 2:51 amI loved this! Nathan and I do this, too. Let's be next-door neighbors and be couple friends. Deal? 😉
claudia b
March 14, 2011 at 2:03 pmi'd be The Stylish Famwife, managing a couple of acres worth of veggie goodness and showing off my style to my farmhouse neighbors 😀
I've just awarded you a Stylish Blogger badge, check out my blog for details, thanks!
Geezees Custom Canvas Art
March 14, 2011 at 5:17 pmLove this, this is so adorable!
PeaceLoveApplesauce
March 14, 2011 at 6:36 pmI would for sure be a big city girl!! Or maybe a small town home family where everyone knows your name. But then again, I'd like beach living! Oh boy, I could never pick just one! 😉
M.O.T.B
March 15, 2011 at 6:13 pmI would have married my husband sooner, traveled and enjoyed just us. Sometimes we yearn for that time when a couple is just a couple before all the chaos and blessings of children. We would have lived in the Times Square studio, established careers, and then became parents…but I always worry had we made different choices…would we be together? And that makes me nervous, because I wouldn't be ME without my boys.
Betsy
March 20, 2011 at 8:57 pmLove this! I've wondered many of those same scenarios myself. Instead, I just become friends with people who are like that and live vicariously through them!
Mrs. T
May 29, 2011 at 3:21 pmThat's funny… those are always the 3 I jump to as well!
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