Will I EVER Sleep Again?

Have you ever been so desperate and defeated that you have actually crawled into your baby’s bed in a last attempt to get them to fall asleep? And I’m not talking about your toddlers race car bed–that would be normal {by my standards}.
I’m talking about squishing into the fetal position and climbing into your 1 year olds play pen in hopes of stopping his piercing cries that have endured for the last hour…
Because that’s where I was tonight.
Curled up.
Like a baby.
In a play pen.
Desperate for Baby W to fall asleep.
And as much as I wanted to let him cry it out {because that method worked like a charm a few months ago}, I couldn’t.
Why not, you ask.
Well, I’ll tell ya.
You see, it seems that over the course of the last few days Baby W has taught himself to hoist his skinny little body up over the side rail of his play pen until he comes crashing down onto the floor–stunned, and further distraught than he already was. And furthermore, he has “un-taught” himself how to fall asleep on his own, in his own bed.
He screams and wails and stomps his little feet in his play pen until Momma and DaDa come to the rescue. But we don’t come to the rescue, because we’ve learned the differences in his cries. And tonight’s cry is a not one of pain or fear…Oh no, this cry, my friends, is a full blown temper tantrum.
How do I know, you ask?
Because when Baby W is scared or not feeling well, tears fill up in his adorable blue eyes until they are streaming down his puffy little cheeks. But… when Baby W is throwing a tantrum, his cries are TEARLESS–and that’s what we had tonight–tearless cries!
 So I put on my tough Momma face while the hubby went into the garage to sulk {he hates the Cry It Out method}, and I settled in to endure the Baby W cry fest. But, it seems Baby W was wise to my tough Momma ways and changed up his methods a bit by throwing himself out of his play pen and hitting his head on the changing table.
And once again, my Momma heart hit the floor.
I rushed into the room, scooped him up and then gave in–and into our bed he crawled.
I couldn’t help but feel responsible for the growing lump on his head and I spent the entire night holding him close {and developing a kink in my neck}.
I suppose I went wrong when I broke his routine and brought him back in bed with us while he was sick last week. I knew the potential repercussions–but I couldn’t bare another night of waking up to him crying in a bed full of his own throw up {sorry for the graphic visual}–so I gave in, and once again, into our bed he crawled.
Exhausted, frustrated, defeated, I woke up the next morning and googled for a solution. You see, out of all my shelves full of Momma-in-training books, not one mentions how to wrangle and baby who can climb out of any baby sleeping apparatus.
And here’s what google suggested:
1. Tent for top of crib/play pen: CHECK–Baby W laughed in the face of this concept as he ripped the tent from it’s “secure” place on top of his play pen while the poles nearly poked out his eye balls.
2. Get him a big boy bed: Are you serious Google? Get my one year old a big boy bed? And expect him to stay in it? Psschh!
3. Reprimand him for getting out of bed: Ummm, how do you suppose I punish a one year old more than he already feels he’s being punished by going to bed in the first place?
So tonight, when I felt I had exhausted all options, I gave in again–but this time I didn’t bring Baby W into my bed–this time I crawled into his–and his tearless crying stopped immediately…
He even cracked a smile.
And as frustrating as the whole song and dance was–I couldn’t help but smile back…
Ashley Stock
I'm Ashley. Sometimes I craft, occasionally I cook, everyday I write, and I'm always Momma. This is my blog. I keep it real while still seeing the rainbows and butterflies in all of life's lessons.
Ashley Stock
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Comments

  1. that little stinker just wants to sleep with his mommy cuz he loves her so much! I know it's not really funny but I can't help but laugh and then I realized I am not too far off from this, love you! and tell my bro to stop being such a baby, hehe!

  2. that little stinker just wants to sleep with his mommy cuz he loves her so much! I know it's not really funny but I can't help but laugh and then I realized I am not too far off from this, love you! and tell my bro to stop being such a baby, hehe!

  3. my 4.5 month old is in this "no sleep" stage right now. We had been doing REALLY good for the last month or so before. Going to sleep between 8-9pm every night, only one wake up feeding at about 4-430am and then waking up between 8-9am. but NOW. ohhhhh no. takes some loud crying and a needy comfort every 30 min or so for at least 3 hours. then wakes up every 2, making me use all my strength NOT to break the baby monitor just so i can get some sleep. finally giving up and feeding him after 3 hours of constant waking. sleep for another 3 maybe and he's ready to be up. naptime, is the same way. it usually ends in sleeping on me. so after 3 cups of coffee, which i seem immune to the caffeine, holding in my frustration, and a loving smile from my little sleep depriving love, i wonder the same thing. WILL I EVER SLEEP!?

    LOVE this post. so real and honest. btw your son is simply adorable.

  4. I know ALL TO WELL the sleeping baby problems and I have crawled into our boys crib many many times. You have to do what works to survive the moment sometimes and throw the rule books out the window.

    I love your blog I have been reading it for a few weeks now, you are awesome! I am super short too so I also sympthazie with your pregnancy post recently ;)

    lauren
    http://www.meandmineblog.com

  5. Stephanie says:

    Oh girl…I slept in my girl's crib with her more times than I can count! My family and friends thought I was NUTS! You are the 1st person I have met that has said they did. Glad to know I am not nuts!! HUGS! I still sleep with my girl way more often than I see my bed : ( But hey-we are all still here, still ok, and the love is all that matters. We are all gonna make it through…this toughest challenge of life!! <3

  6. This story is adorable. As much as it probably didn't feel adorable at the time, this made me crack a little smile too. :)

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